Blessings among Tragedies

Yesterday I awoke to the nightmare we fear: looking out the window and seeing ambulances next door. My in-laws live next door. And both have their share of medical challenges. I sprinted over in my PJs, asking, "is it a man or a woman?" And walked in the front door to see Mother on the floor at the bottom of the stairs where she had fallen. Heart stopping. Mind blowing. Helplessness.

Through the power of prayer (My dad literally drove right out to the first open church he could find to pray, mom said a novena, and my own Sh who is not being raised catholic said a rosery) and the grace of God, Mother just might pull out of this one. She has a long long road ahead of her. And every hour is a challenge. K took his dad to the hospital and his sister joined them later. They ultimately medivacked her to a better Shock trauma institute. So far so good - no surgery yet and she's showing signs of improvements. She is one tough cookie.

I just takes a moment. An instant.

And the blessings? Mother is a huge blessing in my life. Mother and I have long talks about once a week. Yes she lives next door, but my work schedule and the kids and the new life situations mean we don't get together as much as I like. I have them over to dinner usually once a week when the kids are with me. She's officially K's mom and thus my mother-in-law, but she has been "Mother" to me for nearly 20 years. She struggles to understand recent events. She tries to figure it out. Her heart is so big, she still loves me and tells me, which I find amazing given the State of Events. And I love her so - and tell her often. I always will. We have shared a connection since the early days. She often says I'm more like her than her own daughters. We share a love of ice cream, baked potatoes, and talking about nothing. I remember when I was 8+ months pregnant and living with her and dad (K& I lived too far out in the middle of nowhere and the drs insisted I live closer to a hospital). Dad wasn't coming home for dinner, so mother said, "What do you want?" and I said, "Hot Fudge Sundaes!!" So we went to Giant and bought hot fudge and whipped cream and sprinkles (she always has 31 flavors in her freezer). We made BIG sundaes and sat down to eat them when the telltale "beep" of the house alarm went off, signaling someone coming through the door. DAD!!! BUSTED!! His meeting got canceled and he came home for dinner, expecting to find, well, dinner. Instead he found 2 sheepish grownups acting like children caught in the act. We still laugh about it.

We share religion and music and the indescribable love of our children. We shared stories of our pasts, which were strikingly similar in our high school accomplishments. She encouraged me and supported me throughout law school. Oh sometimes she wonders about the "way things were" and I'm sure wonders why I'm not "home with the kids." But she also shared with me her unrealized desire to do what I've been gifted to do: have a career. She was a talented teacher, but gave that up for her family. She was a star substitute for probably 35 years. Her career took a back seat to her family, but if you listen carefully, you hear a bit of wistfulness in her voice when she talks of teaching....

In recent years Mother has been facing the challenges of Parkinsons and various early-onset issues that usually attack one much older than she. Others might moan and lament and say, "Why me?" Mother just pushes on. Pushes through, keeps doing doing doing, going going going. of course, it may be that stubbornness that caught her on the floor. But it is so much of who she is and what she wants to do. She is not one to relax, to take time for herself. She is amazing. I only hope I get to tell her that again, soon.